The Pied Piper

There was a Pied Piper who said, "We live in the greatest country in the world. Help me change it!"

*And the people said, "Change is good!"


Then he said, "We are going to tax the rich fat-cats and redistribute their wealth."

*And the people said, "Sock it to them!"


And then he said, "Redistribution of wealth is good for everybody."

*And Joe the plumber said, "Are you kidding me?"


And Joe's personal records were hacked and publicized.

*And one lone reporter asked, "Isn't that Marxist policy?"

And she was banished from the kingdom!


Then someone asked, "With no foreign relations experience, how will you deal with radical terrorists?"

And the Pied Piper said, "Simple. I'll sit down and talk with them and show them how nice we really are and they'll forget that they ever wanted to kill us all"!


Then the Pied Piper said, "I'll give 95% of you lower taxes."

*And one, lone voice said, "But 40% of us don't pay ANY taxes!"


So the Pied Piper said, "Then I'll give you some of the taxes the fat-cats pay!"

*And the people said, "Show me the money!"


Then the Pied Piper said, "I'll tax your Capital Gains when you sell your homes"!

*And the people yawned and the slumping housing market collapsed.


And he said, "I'll mandate employer- funded health care for EVERY worker and raise the minimum wage."

*And the people said, "Gimme some of that!"


Then he said, "I'll penalize employers who ship jobs overseas."

*And the people said, "Where's my rebate check?"


Then the Pied Piper actually said, "I'll bankrupt the coal industry and electricity rates will sky-rocket!"

*And the people said, "Coal is dirty, coal is evil, no more coal! But we don't care for that part about higher electric rates."


So the Pied Piper said, "Not to worry. If your rebate isn't enough to cover your expenses, we'll bail you out. Just sign up with ACORN and your troubles are over! Then he said, illegal immigrants feel scorned and slighted. Let's grant them amnesty, Social Security, free education, free lunches, free medical care, bi-lingual signs and guaranteed housing."

*And the people said, "Ole`! Bravo!" And they made him King!"


And so it came to pass that employers, facing spiraling costs and ever-higher taxes, raised their prices and laid off workers. Others simply gave up and went out of business and the economy slowed even further.


Then the Pied Piper said, "I am the Messiah and I'm here to save you! We'll just print more money so everyone will have enough! But our foreign trading partners said, Wait a minute. Your dollar isn't worth what it was. You'll have to pay more."

*And the people said, "Wait a minute. That's not fair!"


And the world said, "Neither are these other, idiotic programs you've embraced. You've become a Socialist state and a second-rate power. Now you'll play by our rules!"

*And the people said, "What have we done?"


But it was too late.


If you think this is a fairy tale, open your eyes and ears. It's happening RIGHT NOW!

Word to the Wise

Abraham Lincoln is revered by not only Americans, but worldwide for his leadership, honesty, wisdom, and strength of character. His words are quoted and published probably more than any other American President. He is admired by both the left and right and President Obama likens himself in many ways to Lincoln and seeks to emulate himself in the Lincoln mold. Maybe the current leadership in Washington should heed these words of the great man from Illinois:

"You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift. You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong. You cannot help the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer. You cannot further the brotherhood of many by encouraging class hatred. You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich. You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than you earn. You cannot build character and courage by taking away man's initiative and independence. You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they could and should do for themselves."
--Abraham Lincoln

Honey, I Want A Divorce

The following letter has been going around the internet for the last few weeks, but I think it is too funny not to post here:


Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists and Obama supporters,

We've stuck together since the late 1950s, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know that we tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of America cannot and just will not ever agree on what's right. So let's just end it right now while we can do it on friendly terms. We can smile, shake hands, chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and each go our own way.

So here's a model separation agreement. Our two groups can equitably divide up the country by land mass, each taking a portion. That's going to be the difficult part, but I'm sure our two sides can come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy. Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both sides have such distinct and disparate taste. We don't like redistributive taxes so you can have those. You are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU. And since you hate guns and you hate war, we'll take the firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell. But you are going to be responsible for finding a biodiesel vehicle big enough to haul them around.

We'll keep the capitalism, the greedy corporations, the pharmaceutical companies; we will keep Wal-Mart and Wall Street. You can have the homeless, the homeboys, the hippies and illegal aliens. We will keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, the greedy CEOS and all of the rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and we'll let you have NBC and Hollywood.

You can be nice to Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to invade and hammer anybody that threatens us. You can have the peaceniks and the war protesters. When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we will provide them with security. You won't have to worry about it. We will keep our Judeo-Christian values. You are welcome to Islam, Scientology, Humanism and Shirley Maclaine. You can also have the UN, but we will no longer pay the bill.

We will keep the SUVs, the pickup trucks and the oversize luxury cars. You can have the compacts, the subcompacts and every Subaru station wagon you can find. You can give everybody healthcare, if you can find any practicing doctors. We will continue to believe that healthcare is a privilege and not a right. We will keep "The Battle Hymn of the Republic" and the national anthem, and I am sure you will be happy to substitute in their place "Imagine." I'd like to teach the world to sing "Kumbaya" or "We are the world." We will practice trickle-down economics and you can give trickle-up poverty your best shot. And since it so offends you, we will keep our history, our name and our flag.

Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along other like-minded liberal and conservative patriots. And if you do not agree, just hit delete. In the friendly spirit of parting, I'll bet you ANWAR which one of us will need whose help in about 15 years.

Sincerely,
John J Wall
Law student and an American

P.S. You can also have Barbara Streisand and Jane Fonda